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   <title><![CDATA[2008 Winners : 1st - On a Clear Day You Can See All the Way...]]></title>
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    <![CDATA[<strong>Author:</strong> <a href="http://forum.sfreader.com/member_profile.asp?PF=34">Desmond Warzel</a><br /><strong>Subject:</strong> 1st - On a Clear Day You Can See All the Way...<br /><strong>Posted:</strong> Jun-28-2015 at 6:34pm<br /><br />Author here;<div>&nbsp;</div><div>If you enjoyed this story, you <em>must</em> hear it as a full-cast audio production, courtesy of the fine folks at <em>The Drabblecast</em>&nbsp;(simply scroll to the bottom of the page to locate the audio player).&nbsp; You won't be sorry.</div><div>&nbsp;</div><div>&nbsp; http://www.drabblecast.org/2014/10/05/drabblecast-340-clear-day-can-see-way-c&#111;nspiracy/ - http://www.drabblecast.org/2014/10/05/drabblecast-340-clear-day-can-see-way-conspiracy/</a></div><span style="font-size:10px"><br /><br />Edited by Desmond Warzel - Jun-28-2015 at 6:34pm</span>]]>
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   <title><![CDATA[2008 Winners : 1st - On a Clear Day You Can See All the Way...]]></title>
   <link>http://forum.sfreader.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=83&amp;PID=82&amp;title=1st-on-a-clear-day-you-can-see-all-the-way#82</link>
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    <![CDATA[<strong>Author:</strong> <a href="http://forum.sfreader.com/member_profile.asp?PF=1">SFReader</a><br /><strong>Subject:</strong> 1st - On a Clear Day You Can See All the Way...<br /><strong>Posted:</strong> Mar-05-2015 at 5:42pm<br /><br /><i>This story is the end result of an experiment, in which I was looking for a way to tell a story entirely in dialogue without being tedious.&nbsp; The radio format provided a means of introducing numerous characters into a conversation without straining credulity.&nbsp; Though the story itself is entirely a product of my imagination, the character of Mike Colavito is inspired by an actual curmudgeonly, mayor-hating Cleveland media figure--as northeastern Ohio readers will have immediately noticed--who once devoted a show to unusually-ubiquitous jet contrails.&nbsp; However, I can assure you that the ending of the story bears no resemblence to actual events--at least as far as I can remember...</i><br><br><b>On a Clear Day You Can See All the Way to Conspiracy<br>by Desmond Warzel<br>copyright 2009 by Desmond Warzel <br></b><br><i>You're listening to the Mike Colavito Show on Cleveland's home for straight talk, WCUY 1200.&nbsp; The opinions expressed on this program do not reflect those of WCUY, its management, or its sponsors.</i><br><br>Fair warning; I'm in a mood today, folks.<br><br>We've got a mayor whose only talent seems to be showing up at luncheons and waving at the cameras.<br><br>Eighty bucks I had to pay yesterday for not wearing my seat belt.&nbsp; Show me the seat belts on a school bus.<br><br>I saw a Cleveland athlete on national TV last night wearing a Yankees cap.<br><br>And every day I get at least a dozen calls from schmucks who think that people like me are the problem in this city.<br><br>Tell me America's not falling apart.<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>And some of you people--including our programming director, by the way--seem to think I'm running my mouth too much and not taking enough phone calls.&nbsp; I've only been number one in radio in this city for ten straight years; what would I know?<br><br>You want calls?&nbsp; You got 'em.&nbsp; Steven in Mayfield Heights, you're on the air.<br><br>"Hey, what's up, Mike?"<br><br>The rent.&nbsp; Art in Seven Hills, you're on WCUY.<br><br>"How you doing, Mike.&nbsp; Just wondering if you caught that ball game last night?"<br><br>No.&nbsp; Andrea in Rocky River, go ahead.<br><br>"Hi, Mike, first-time caller."<br><br>Well, call back tomorrow and you'll be a second-time caller.&nbsp; Carol in Cleveland, what's on your mind?<br><br>"Mike, what do you think of water boarding?"<br><br>My wife and I water board all the time, and it's improved our sex life dramatically.&nbsp; Chuck in Parma, you're on the air.<br><br>"Hey, Mike, I heard your show yesterday, and I was just wondering, if you know so much about football, why you don't take over as head coach of the Browns?"<br><br>I wouldn't want to take the pay cut.&nbsp; Mina in Lakewood, you're on the air.<br><br>"Does your wife think that water boarding crack was funny?"<br><br>Play your cards right some night and you could find out for yourself, Mina.&nbsp; Tommy in Beachwood, you're on WCUY.<br><br>"Hi, Mike, just wondering who you think the Indians should try and trade for next year."<br><br>Your mother.&nbsp; Jane in Euclid, go ahead.<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>Looks like we lost Jane in Euclid.&nbsp; Must have answered her question already.&nbsp; That's all right; we got in seven callers in under a minute.&nbsp; Everyone happy now?&nbsp; Hey, Jake, I have to take a breather; do the traffic.<br><br>What?<br><br>Oh, yeah.&nbsp; This traffic is brought to you by West Side Hardware.<br><br><i>Thanks, Mike.&nbsp; Not much happening right now; 480, 271, and 77 are all clear, but traffic on the Shoreway is backed up in both directions, so our listeners might want to allow a few extra minutes if they're headed that way.&nbsp; For West Side Hardware, this has been your WCUY traffic report on Cleveland's home for straight talk.</i><br><br>Hey, Jake, don't go yet.&nbsp; You still there?&nbsp; I gotta take the Shoreway home after the show.&nbsp; Any idea what the holdup is?<br><br><i>Can't say, Mike; no accidents, just a general slowdown all along the lakeshore.</i><br><br>Wonderful.<br><br>And people wonder why I'm always giving the mayor grief.&nbsp; Straightest stretch of highway in America, and traffic still won't move.&nbsp; Somebody on the Shoreway, call in and tell me what the hell's going on over there.&nbsp; Franklin in Cleveland, you're on the air.<br><br>"What's up, Mike?&nbsp; You gonna let me talk?"<br><br>Don't worry, it's all out of my system.&nbsp; The floor's yours.<br><br>"Well, you're entitled to your opinion about the mayor, but come on, man, how you gonna blame him for slow traffic?"<br><br>The traffic's just a symptom.&nbsp; I'm talking about neglect.&nbsp; Name me one thing the mayor's accomplished since he took office.<br><br>"Well--"<br><br>You can't, Franklin, because there are none.&nbsp; Homicides in the triple digits, a downtown that looks like Baghdad, none of it bothers him.&nbsp; Everything's A-OK as long as his picture's on the front page every day.<br><br>"In fairness, Mike, he didn't <i>create</i> those problems, he inherited most of them--"<br><br>Gotta let you go, Franklin, I think we've got an answer to my traffic query on line two.&nbsp; Pete on the Shoreway, what's happening over there?<br><br>"There's no wreck or anything, Mike; I think everyone's just slowing down to look at the sky."<br><br>The sky?<br><br>"Bunch of jet trails over Lake Erie."<br><br>Jet trails?&nbsp; I'm gonna be late for my poker game tonight because a bunch of morons are staring at <i>jet trails</i>?&nbsp; You people never seen a jet trail before?<br><br>"Well, there's one hell of a lot of them; must be hundreds going every which way.&nbsp; I've never seen anything like it.&nbsp; Might be military planes--they're looping and weaving all over the place."<br><br>Okay, thanks, Pete.&nbsp; Now hang up the phone and pay attention before you kill someone.<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>Well, if there's anyone left listening after this fascinating line of inquiry, in the next hour we'll be talking to the Indians' hitting coach...<br><br>How's that?<br><br>All right, one more.&nbsp; Mel on the Shoreway, go ahead, you're on the air.<br><br>"Hi, Mike.&nbsp; Hey, if you could see this for yourself, you might not dismiss it so fast.&nbsp; You think anybody else in the Cleveland media is going to bother looking into it?"<br><br>You're right about that.&nbsp; But listen, you don't think this might just be regular air traffic?<br><br>"Well, one of them just flew straight up, so you tell me."<br><br>Thanks, Mel.<br><br>Okay, I have no window and I can't leave, so somebody out there take some pictures of these things and email 'em to me during the ad break.&nbsp; Meanwhile, I'll run down the hall to our WCUY news department and lean on those clowns, see if they know anything.&nbsp; Let's get to the bottom of this so we can move on.<br><br>&#091;break&#093;<br><br>And we're back on the Mike Colavito Show, where we're devoting fifty thousand watts to a discussion of jet trails, if you can believe it.&nbsp; Thanks to our listeners, I've now seen some pictures of this mess, and, as much as it pains me, I have to agree with those people out on the Shoreway; that's no ordinary air traffic.<br><br>And, I just checked with our newsroom; they have no clue.&nbsp; No surprise there, they haven't broken a story since Teapot Dome.&nbsp; Guess we'll just have to wait and see.&nbsp; Anyhow, unless you have something new to add, no more calls about this, okay?&nbsp; We know what it looks like.&nbsp; Craig in Mentor, you're on the air.<br><br>"Have you seen the sky this afternoon, Mike?&nbsp; You should see what's going on up there!"<br><br>Richard in Dayton...Dayton?&nbsp; Really?&nbsp; Well, thanks for listening all they way down there, Richard.&nbsp; Hey, at least you're not calling about the sky over Lake Erie, right?<br><br>"Actually, Mr. Colavito, that's exactly what I'm calling about."<br><br>You mean this is going on in Dayton, too?<br><br>"Well, Mr. Colavito--"<br><br>Call me Mike, we're all friends here.<br><br>"Mike, I'm not in Dayton proper; I'm calling from Wright-Patterson."<br><br>The Air Force base?<br><br>"Yes sir, and I just wanted to clarify for your listening audience that there is no unusual aviation activity over northeastern Ohio."<br><br>None at all?<br><br>"No sir."<br><br>That's official?<br><br>"Yes sir."<br><br>So does that mean all those jet trails are from commercial planes after all?<br><br>"Absolutely."<br><br>Richard, I might have been born on a Monday, but it wasn't last Monday.<br><br>"Mike, the air traffic's always like that; but between the clouds and the pollution, you just can't see it most of the time.&nbsp; Sometimes, though, when the weather's cold and the sky's clear enough, those trails become visible."<br><br>And that's all it is?<br><br>"That's all, Mike."<br><br>There are a lot of planes up there, Richard.<br><br>"It may look like it, but it's perfectly normal."<br><br>Well, I appreciate your call, sir.<br><br>"Any time, Mike.&nbsp; I'm just doing my duty, which in this case means averting a potential panic before it gets started."<br><br>Thanks again, Richard.<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>Cold weather and a clear sky, gimme a break.&nbsp; No way I'm falling for this.&nbsp; Ronnie in Solon, you're on the air.<br><br>"Hey Mike, maybe we're being invaded by Canada."<br><br>Could be, Ronnie; they were probably pretty peeved when the Indians swept the Blue Jays last week.&nbsp; Jeannie in South Euclid, you're on WCUY.<br><br>"They might be flying saucers, Mike, had you considered that?"<br><br>Anyone smart enough to get to Earth would know better than to look for intelligent life in Cleveland.&nbsp; Look, I know Jeannie's kidding, but let's nip this stuff in the bud, okay?&nbsp; I don't need those kinds of people coming out of the woodwork.&nbsp; John in Ashtabula, you're on the air.<br><br>"Hi, Mike.&nbsp; Listen, I wouldn't go dismissing this alien theory out of hand if I were you.&nbsp; It just so happens I'm an extraterrestrial myself."<br><br>Oh, is that a fact?&nbsp; Now we're getting somewhere.&nbsp; And when did you land here in Ohio?<br><br>"Oh, I didn't land in the United States; I landed in Mexico and snuck across.&nbsp; Much easier that way."<br><br>Never be funnier than the host, John.&nbsp; Jules in Cleveland Heights, go ahead.<br><br>"Mike, I don't know what's going on up there, but I can only hope it <i>is</i> aliens.&nbsp; I think we've gone as far as can on our own, and our only hope for peace and harmony is the descent of a new wisdom."<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>Well, you're definitely from Cleveland Heights, there's no doubt about that.&nbsp; Go ahead, Jules.<br><br>"Humans have lost the way.&nbsp; We need to evolve and we're stuck fast.&nbsp; Did you know we only use ten percent of our brains?&nbsp; Imagine if we could learn to harness all of our potential!"<br><br>Hey, Jules, guess what?&nbsp; People use a hundred percent of their brains all the time.&nbsp; It's called a seizure, dummy.<br><br>I've already cut you off, Jules, but if you're still listening, let me help you out, buddy; I think you hit the wrong button on your radio this afternoon.&nbsp; You want the one marked FM.&nbsp; This is AM, and it's not safe for you here.<br><br>Let's go to commercial, we've got bills to pay.<br><br>&#091;break&#093;<br><br>And we're back, with certainly the oddest show I've ever done in ten years of radio.&nbsp; We've been discussing what I suspect are military jets in enormous numbers over Lake Erie, and I'm under the impression some people would rather we didn't talk about it.&nbsp; There's more to this than meets the eye, folks.<br><br>William in Dayton...another caller from Dayton?&nbsp; I suppose you're in the Air Force too?<br><br>"Mr. Colavito, we've already explained the situation adequately.&nbsp; You'd be well-advised to stop spreading misinformation, let the matter drop altogether, and continue your show with a different topic."<br><br>What's that, a threat?<br><br>Hello?<br><br>Well, you can forget it, William, or whatever your real name is, I'll talk about it until morning if I feel like it.&nbsp; If something dangerous is happening, we've got a right to know.&nbsp; You'll have to drag me out of this studio.<br><br>You think I'm afraid of the government?&nbsp; You think I have skeletons in my closet?&nbsp; All my skeletons are arranged tastefully on the front lawn.&nbsp; Patrick in Gates Mills, you're on the air.<br><br>"Hello, Mike?"<br><br>Go ahead, Patrick.<br><br>"Mike, I think I can clarify this entire situation for everyone, but I'll need you to bear with me."<br><br>I'm begging you, Patrick.&nbsp; I'm all ears.<br><br>"Thank you, Mike.&nbsp; Now, I have to begin by saying that I am not originally from this planet--"<br><br>Stop right there.<br><br>"Yes, Mike?"<br><br>&#091;sigh&#093;<br><br>All right, let me tell you something, Patrick, this better get real interesting real fast.&nbsp; If you're just some everyday nut, call back after midnight when that UFO guy comes on.&nbsp; You got me?<br><br>"I promise to make it worth your while, Mike."<br><br>See that you do, Patrick.<br><br>"Perhaps this story would be more palatable if I spoke hypothetically.&nbsp; Suppose a person was in possession of some sensitive information--a new technology, say, or a military secret, or just some dirt on a politician--that, in the right hands, could change galactic civilization forever..."<br><br>Galactic civilization?&nbsp; Look, I'm not much of a Trekkie, Patrick.&nbsp; I only watch baseball, wrestling, and Rachael Ray.<br><br>"And suppose...Rachael Ray?&nbsp; Really?"<br><br>Get on with it, Patrick.<br><br>"And suppose you wanted this person out of the way, but he had a high enough profile that he couldn't simply be done away with.&nbsp; What would you do?&nbsp; What <i>could</i> you do?&nbsp; Hide him in plain sight, on a crowded but unsophisticated planet, where no one could attempt to contact or rescue him without endangering his life.&nbsp; And he would have no choice but to adjust to his exile, to try and blend in with the barbarians, because even if he told the truth to everyone he met, no one would believe him."<br><br>And this hypothetical alien is you, I suppose?<br><br>"That's correct.&nbsp; I appreciate your open-mindedness."<br><br>No problem, Patrick.&nbsp; Do you look human?&nbsp; You blending in okay?<br><br>"My disguise has been effective so far."<br><br>What do you really look like?<br><br>"That's hard to describe, at least in English."<br><br>Well, thanks for outing yourself, so to speak, here on the Mike Colavito Show.&nbsp; But what's it got to do with anything?<br><br>"Those flying saucers over the lake--and that is indeed what they are, not jet planes--represent a rather ill-advised attempt by some of my more zealous supporters to effect my rescue."<br><br>Patrick?<br><br>"Yes, Mike?"<br><br>That's about as plausible as anything else I've heard today.&nbsp; But why reveal yourself now?<br><br>"Well, since the military is obviously monitoring your show, I thought perhaps an explanation of my situation might convince them not to interfere.&nbsp; Despite my present situation, I still have some rather powerful friends, and if something should happen to those spacecraft, even through a misunderstanding, it might not bode well for this planet, which, I must say, I've grown rather fond of."<br><br>And I'm sure the feeling's mutual, Patrick.&nbsp; Can you hang on through the break?&nbsp; This is the most fun I've had in a long time.<br><br>"I should really go, Mike; I've revealed too much already, and I've certainly placed myself in danger.&nbsp; But thank you for hearing me out."<br><br>God love you, Patrick, you've made my afternoon.<br><br>&#091;break&#093;<br><br>If you're just joining us, we've been discussing the plethora of jet trails over northeastern Ohio this afternoon, despite objections from certain quarters, and our most amusing theory comes from an apparent extraterrestrial living out in Gates Mills.&nbsp; If anybody can top it, I'm all ears.&nbsp; Ahmed in Lyndhurst, you're on the air.<br><br>"Yes, Mike, I wanted to talk to you about Patrick; the last caller?&nbsp; Don't believe a word he said; that story was nothing but a pack of lies."<br><br>Congratulations on figuring that out, Ahmed.&nbsp; I was just having a little harmless fun by going along with him.&nbsp; What's the problem?<br><br>"Harmless is hardly the word I would use to describe the most nefarious criminal in the galaxy, Mike."<br><br>Oh, boy.<br><br>I asked for it, I guess.&nbsp; Much as I'd like to just go home right now and ride out the invasion in my media room, I guess you better elaborate.<br><br>"Naturally.&nbsp; Hypothetically speaking, suppose there were a master criminal of such malevolent cunning, with a network of felonious associates so vast, that anything he set his sights on was as good as his.&nbsp; Such a person could conceivably be responsible for the misappropriation of thousands of valuable items: state treasures, art objects, anything he could find a buyer for.&nbsp; Eventually there would be no option for a moral society but to banish him to a planet where, from a galactic standpoint, there was nothing worth stealing.&nbsp; No offense."<br><br>None taken, Ahmed.&nbsp; And how do you know this?<br><br>"Well, one could never set such a dangerous person loose on a primitive planet without also leaving a minder behind to keep an eye on things.&nbsp; It would be unethical."<br><br>And this minder, that's you, right?<br><br>"That's correct."<br><br>So you are also an alien?<br><br>"That's right, Mike."<br><br>And the trails?<br><br>"They're spacecraft, just as Patrick said."<br><br>He was telling the truth about that?<br><br>"I'm not scheduled to be relieved of my post here for another five years, so it can only be his cronies trying to extract him.&nbsp; I'm sure Patrick would like nothing better than for you to believe that he's a political prisoner; he seems to think Earth is peopled entirely by rubes.&nbsp; I don't, which is why I'm entrusting you with the truth.&nbsp; And I would also advise your Air Force to go ahead and engage those spacecraft; their destruction would be to the general good, and an immeasurable favor to Earth."<br><br>I wonder if we could get Patrick back on for a rebuttal.&nbsp; Anything else to add, Ahmed?<br><br>"That's it, Mike.&nbsp; Strictly speaking, I've said too much, but I think it's for the best.&nbsp; I couldn't just sit idly by."<br><br>And we appreciate it, Ahmed.&nbsp; What do you think of our planet?<br><br>"I've seen worse.&nbsp; I do like the food."<br><br>Thanks, Ahmed.<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>Wow.<br><br>Is it time for the news yet?<br><br>Well, we still have a few minutes before the news break.&nbsp; Time for one more call.&nbsp; Maybe the Air Force'll call back.<br><br>Line one's lit up, but there's no name or city.&nbsp; Hey, screener; who's on line one?<br><br>What do you mean you don't know?<br><br>Christ, I gotta do everything myself, I guess.<br><br>Okay, you're on the air on WCUY; who am I talking to?<br><br>Hello?<br><br>"I enjoyed hearing from Patrick and Ahmed very much, but I've got a story that's even better.&nbsp; Are you interested?"<br><br>Sure, what have I got to lose?&nbsp; But who--<br><br>"Imagine a galactic civilization of unknowable antiquity, lapsed into decadence after eons of peace.<br><br>"Imagine a race from elsewhere, born of darkness but covetous of the light, desirous of exterminating the galaxy's present inhabitants and assuming their place, but so unimaginably patient as to postpone invasion for nearly an eternity, until their evolution assured their practical invincibility.<br><br>"Such a race, attacking from all sides and from within, might very well eliminate all traces of galactic culture in mere hours.<br><br>"They might then take their time surveying the uncivilized worlds, calculating which species might best be enslaved and which simply eradicated.<br><br>"It is conceivable that on one such marginal planet, they might discover two remnants of the newly-extinct civilization; a convict and his jailor, perhaps.<br><br>"Fastidious to a fault, they would insist on destroying these last two anachronistic relics of a dead society, though, not entirely lacking a sense of humor, they might first take them back to their native worlds and show them what had been wrought in their absence.<br><br>"Knowing that others of their race would eventually return to this planet when its fate was determined, their innate orderliness would dictate that no evidence of this visit remain.&nbsp; To this end, a tailored but relatively simple signal, delivered simultaneously on all communication frequencies, would readily excise all offending memories from the natives' unsophisticated brains, leaving them once again blissfully ignorant.<br><br>"All hypothetically speaking, of course.&nbsp; May I ask what you think of my story?"<br><br>Not much, I'm afraid.&nbsp; Good delivery, but lacks panache.&nbsp; I appreciate your call, though--<br><br>What is that?&nbsp; Does anyone else hear that?<br><br>That noise, it's going right up my spine.&nbsp; Are we broadcasting that?&nbsp; What the hell...<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>What was that?<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>What were we talking about?&nbsp; Should we take a call?&nbsp; I have no idea what's going on...<br><br>&#091;pause&#093;<br><br>Okay, it's time for WCUY's award-winning news, then we'll talk to the Cleveland Indians' hitting coach and see if we can't iron out this trouble they've been having.&nbsp; Back in a few...<br><br><br><br>Desmond Warzel has moved on, but the city of Cleveland, Ohio, will always have a place in his heart.&nbsp; A cold, graffiti-covered place, with inefficient local government and no sports championships.&nbsp; His short stories can be found in Abyss &amp; Apex, Shroud, and AlienSkin, and are forthcoming in such anthologies as The Best of Abyss &amp; Apex Volume One (Hadley Rille Books) and Things Aren't What They Seem (From the Asylum Books).&nbsp; In 2008 he was a finalist for the Micro Award for fiction under one thousand words.]]>
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   <pubDate>Thu, 05 Mar 2015 17:42:08 +0000</pubDate>
   <guid isPermaLink="true">http://forum.sfreader.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=83&amp;PID=82&amp;title=1st-on-a-clear-day-you-can-see-all-the-way#82</guid>
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   <title><![CDATA[2008 Winners : 2nd - Mary, Mary Quite Contrary, by S. J. Higbee]]></title>
   <link>http://forum.sfreader.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=82&amp;PID=81&amp;title=2nd-mary-mary-quite-contrary-by-s-j-higbee#81</link>
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    <![CDATA[<strong>Author:</strong> <a href="http://forum.sfreader.com/member_profile.asp?PF=1">SFReader</a><br /><strong>Subject:</strong> 2nd - Mary, Mary Quite Contrary, by S. J. Higbee<br /><strong>Posted:</strong> Mar-05-2015 at 5:40pm<br /><br /><i>The heart and starting point of the story was the tale that Esta tells Mary about the love affair between Bernice and Zentxs, which I'd written as an entry for a local St. Valentine's Day short story competition.&nbsp; But it was very two dimensional - and I got to wondering just how humanity would evolve after Zentxs' DNA hit the human genepool.&nbsp; As for the relationship between Esta and Mary - that just sneaked into the story when I wasn't looking...</i><br><br><b>Mary, Mary Quite Contrary<br>by S. J. Higbee<br>copyright 2009 by S. J. Higbee</b><br><br>"What jer think?&nbsp; Will I do?"&nbsp; Mary clattered into my workspace without knocking. &nbsp;<br><br><i>Has she properly forgiven me, at last?</i><br><br>I snapped off the data-sink with a quick movement of my tongue.&nbsp; While my heart folded into pain-shapes of love and worry as I watched my sixteen year old granddaughter twirl.&nbsp; Her full skirts fluttered away from her two legs, making her slim figure look impossibly frail and beautiful.<br><br><i>Will you do - what kind of question is that? You make butterflies look drab...</i><br><br>Her face, for once, was laughing and open as she watched for my reaction.<br><br>A dozen possible replies shuttled through my head and I hesitated a nanosec too long, trying to pick the best of them, "Do?&nbsp; Hm.&nbsp; Better instruct House Security to expect a spike in junkmail as a bunch of lovesick boys start burbling poetry and indecent proposals into our talkslot."<br><br>She rolled her eyes.&nbsp; However, the giggle and self conscious head-toss told me that she was pleased.<br><br>Limp with relief that I'd so far got it right, I pushed my luck further.&nbsp; "Your Bernice-box is over there.&nbsp; James wanted to add some embellishments.&nbsp; But I beat him off with a stick."<br><br>Darting across the room she scooped it up, as protective as a mother with a newborn,<br><br>"Oh, thank you...&nbsp; If he'd messed with it, I'd be zilched from the competition.&nbsp; It's <br><br>s'posed to be all our own work.&nbsp; They scan for mechie input, you know."<br><br><i>I know.&nbsp; But how you're s'posed to compete with aug-dexterous fingers, the Maker alone knows.&nbsp; Because I don't.&nbsp; And that's all that James was trying to do.&nbsp; Even up the odds.&nbsp; Make it fairer for you...</i><br><br>"What's the time?"&nbsp; The fact she was even asking, hurt.&nbsp; The fact that she wasn't pre-progged with something so basic as Time-sense...&nbsp;&nbsp; &nbsp;<br><br>"Nineteen sixteen."&nbsp; I clamped my mouth shut.&nbsp; Telling her the seconds passing always annoyed her.&nbsp; And besides, with my mouth zipped, I could resist the temptation to remind her that I'd told her that she was far too early in getting ready for the Ball.<br><br>She started pacing – a habit that always grated with me.&nbsp; It always seemed such a waste of time and energy.&nbsp; But while data-diving, I'd discovered it was a common stress habit among our unimproved ancestors.&nbsp; Like Mary.<br><br>"Why don't you go through your dance routine, again?" <i>Anything to stop this pointless marching up and down the room...</i><br><br>Stopping, she glanced at me sideways.&nbsp; As if trying to figure what I was really saying.&nbsp; As if she didn't trust me.<br><br><i>And why would she?&nbsp; I betrayed her...</i><br><br>Keeping my face calm, I regulated my heartbeat and blood pressure.&nbsp; But nothing eased the hurt knifing my soul.<br><br>Favoring me with a tight grin, she shrugged, "Nah.&nbsp; I'll only get sweaty and muss up my dress."<br><br>Another lack.&nbsp; She didn't have the smallest control over her endocrine system – not even the sweat glands...<br><br>Carefully fluffing out her accordion-pleated skirts, she lowered herself onto the floor, which rose to meet her, gently cushioning around her.&nbsp; While I mentally blessed James, whose concern for her almost equalled mine.<br><br><i>And they say mechies don't have souls...</i><br><br>"Why don't you tell me the story of the Ball?"&nbsp; Then - in one of those mercurial mood changes of hers that always caught me off-guard, she suddenly seemed angry, "After all, you know all that kind of stuff - you being an expert data-diver."<br><br><i>Stay calm...</i>&nbsp; "If you want the story, I'll certainly tell it..."<br><br><i>Just like I used to tell your mother.&nbsp; </i><br><br>Clearing my throat, I began, "Bernice Starseer was one of the best astro-navigators of her generation.&nbsp; Born and raised at the Hawking-Penrose Academy, she graduated a full four years early-" &nbsp;<br><br>"Academy – what's that about?"&nbsp; Her tone was sharply aggressive. &nbsp;<br><br><i>So much for our managing to pass the time in a civilized manner.&nbsp; She's not going to forgive me – and I'm a wet-brain for hoping she had.</i><br><br>On the verge of pleading tiredness and cutting short this hurtful dialogue, some instinct made me pause and answer patiently, "Academy just means a learning establishment."&nbsp; I paused a beat, waiting for her to jump in.&nbsp; But she didn't.<br><br>"The Hawking-Penrose Academy was where all the brightest and best of that era were intensively trained."&nbsp; Resuming the tale, my voice rose and fell in familiar, practiced cadences.<br><br><i>This was one of Debra's favorite stories</i>.&nbsp; I shut down the memory of another time, with another bright-eyed youngster listening to my words.&nbsp; I was hurting enough, right now...<br><br>"But it was tough, back in those days.&nbsp; Post-Diasporan humanity was hanging on by its fingers – those who had fingers, anyway."<br><br>I inwardly winced that I'd let slip <i>that</i> weak joke.&nbsp; Never a rib-cracker, Mary certainly wouldn't find it remotely humorous. &nbsp;<br><br>I hurried on, "Once we'd established a few colonies, the early unified push for survival melted away.&nbsp; It didn't help that mutants were being persecuted, as in those days most humans were born along the Terran format..." I faltered at the rising color in her cheeks.<br><br><i>What am I doing, telling her this tale?&nbsp; It's only going to end in another emotional outburst – and I've had enough of those to last a long light year.&nbsp; James assures me that she isn't taking any chemical stimulants – and my research indicates that unimproved teenagers often presented with temperamental disturbances during this phase of their development – but surely, they weren't</i> this <i>touchy?</i><br><br>"Terran format?&nbsp; What's that?" She leaned towards me.<br><br>I blinked.&nbsp; This wasn't anger – she was excited.<br><br>"The Terran format is the basic homo sapiens model that all augmented humans were based on.&nbsp; Two arms... legs... ten fingers... toes..."&nbsp; I didn't look at her.&nbsp; I couldn't.<br><br>"That's me," she breathed, her eyes shining, "So, I'm not some kind of freak, after all."<br><br>My nictitating membranes fluttered in shock, "No!&nbsp; Whatever gave you that idea?&nbsp; You are the original template of what humankind came from.&nbsp; All of us."<br><br>I could sense their hot dampness as her frail fingers twined together. &nbsp;<br><br>"So... how come I am as I am?"&nbsp; Her voice dropped to a whisper, "Why aren't I like everyone else?"<br><br><i>The question I've been waiting for, since she was old enough to talk.&nbsp; </i><br><br>I didn't bother trying to modulate my heart rate as it battered my ribcage. &nbsp;<br><br><i>You were an experiment by a stupid, unthinking group of people too wrapped up in their own wet-brained ideas to properly consider what they were doing.&nbsp; I can't say that, can I?&nbsp; Even if it's the truth...</i><br><br>I liked my lips with a sand-dry tongue, "Your mother - she was very young..."<br><br><i>Also the truth.&nbsp; Only a couple of years older than you are, now</i><br><br>"She found herself pregnant with you,"&nbsp; Somehow my hand was stroking hers, while one of my tentacles curled around her waist.<br><br>I tensed.&nbsp; These days, Mary hated my tentacles near her.&nbsp; But as I started to withdraw, she stopped me.&nbsp; For which I was numbly grateful.&nbsp; Because right now, I needed the comfort of her touch as much as I needed the air in my lungs.<br><br>I continued, "Your father...&nbsp; He was older and Debra – your mother - was very much in love with him."<br><br><i>It seems odd.&nbsp; Saying her name aloud.&nbsp; I haven't spoken of her for years.</i><br><br>"He believed that our current form was a betrayal of our human heritage and he persuaded a number of people to his way of thinking.&nbsp; So, when the time came for your augments..."<br><br>My voice trailed away.&nbsp; <i>Debra refused to have them.&nbsp; Not a single upgrade for her poor little foetus.&nbsp; We argued, her and me.&nbsp; Screamed hateful things at each other.&nbsp; Things mothers and daughters don't have any business saying.&nbsp; And when she wouldn't see reason, I Reported her. &nbsp;<br><br>But he was ready for me.&nbsp; Within the hour, he'd whisked her off-planet to some hiding place he'd previously arranged.&nbsp; And I lost my bright, beautiful girl...</i><br><br>"Granny?" <br><br><i>She hasn't called me Granny for months. Didn't realize how much I've missed it...</i><br><br>Mary's voice was shaken, "You don't have to do this, if it-"<br><br>"Of course, I do, child.&nbsp; This is your story.&nbsp; You have a right to know..."&nbsp; Words were falling out of my mouth with the same distressing frequency as the tears escaping from my eyes.&nbsp; I seemed to have lost control of both functions.<br><br>"You were born in some primitive hovel, without any medical help.&nbsp; Other than her own inbuilt augments, your mother had no pain relief – and that sack of dog-dirt wanted her to override that, so that ‘the experience would be more like that of our ancient mothers'!"<br><br><i>When Debra had told me these horrible facts, she wasn't even angry.&nbsp; Too exhausted, too drained...</i><br><br>"Granny!" Mary put her hand over her mouth, half laughing, half horrified, "Never heard you curse, before."<br><br>Of course, I should have been ashamed at using such unacceptable language to the girl – especially about her own father.&nbsp; But I'm afraid to say that my overriding feeling was one of relief.&nbsp; And still the words poured out of me.&nbsp; I couldn't have stopped now, even if she'd asked me to.&nbsp; Not that she did. &nbsp;<br><br>Her eyes burned like lamps, fixing me with that fierce, pleading look that always tore at my heart.<br><br>"For three days and nights, your mother struggled to birth you."<br><br><i>She said she'd screamed till she had no voice left...</i><br><br>"Till one of your father's followers insisted on using a mechie to deliver you.&nbsp; Probably saved your life."<br><br>I was sobbing, now.&nbsp; Disgraceful lack of control.&nbsp; "And I m-met you just over two weeks' later."<br><br><i>Debra turned up, looking like something sicked up from a black hole.&nbsp; Holding a puce-faced bundle of fury. &nbsp;<br><br>She'd shoved you into my arms.&nbsp; "Here.&nbsp; I can't do this anymore.&nbsp; It cries and cries.&nbsp; Fouls and wets itself.&nbsp; Can't tell us what it wants.&nbsp; So it screams.&nbsp; Crade said I had to leave – that the baby was upsetting the others..." she'd started weeping.</i><br><br>"You were such an angry little thing..."&nbsp; <i>Small wonder.&nbsp; No speech augment, or bowel and bladder control – your tiny life was just a series of helpless humiliations.</i><br><br>My nose was running for the first time in ten years, "You had colic, you see..."<br><br><i>Such an innocent little word ‘colic'.&nbsp; I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.&nbsp; Well – your rotted father, maybe.&nbsp; </i><br><br>"Which meant that food gave you stomach ache," I shook my head at the memory.&nbsp; "I'd walk up and down cuddling you.&nbsp; And when I got too tired, James would take over.&nbsp; I sang to you till my voice cracked..."<br><br>Her small hand was now gripping mine.&nbsp; "What about my mother?" &nbsp;<br><br><i>A good question</i>.&nbsp; I mopped my streaming nose, "I don't know.&nbsp; She wouldn't stay.&nbsp; We'd... said some things to each other.&nbsp; Before you were born."<br><br><i>The memory of them still flickered in her eyes.&nbsp; And although she left her child here, she couldn't forgive me.&nbsp; </i><br><br>The words still bubbled out of my lips, "There were times when I was so tired, I fell asleep standing up.&nbsp; Because you'd developed in the womb without any augments at all, the specialists felt that adding them post-natally was too dangerous."<br><br><i>They all said that the two to three years it would take you to naturally learn to speak would leave you trailing your contemporaries so far behind, you'd never catch up.&nbsp; Suggested you should be admitted to a suitable research establishment, where you could be studied...</i><br><br>"I data-dived as much as I could about our basic ancestors.&nbsp; Discovered how they developed as children and between us, James and me arranged the high-input learning Program..."<br><br>She flinched, face hardening as her lips tightened.<br><br><i>That's it.&nbsp; I've done it, now.&nbsp; Shouldn't have mentioned the Program.</i><br><br>But I couldn't stop talking.&nbsp; "I know you hate it.&nbsp; Feel that I've been too hard on you.&nbsp; But, I didn't know what else to do.&nbsp; I won't be around forever..."<br><br><i>Not a whole lot longer, actually.&nbsp; There's a price to pay for all our wonderful augments.&nbsp; A pharmacy of expensive drugs and downtime in a rejuv tank.&nbsp; But I had other priorities.&nbsp; Access to sealed files on the distant past doesn't come cheap – and as for the rejuv...&nbsp; There was this poor, disadvantaged baby to tend.&nbsp; And protect.&nbsp; And teach.</i><br><br>"...and you needed to learn so many things, so fast.&nbsp; They wanted to take you away!&nbsp; I had to prove that you were capable of leading a normal life.&nbsp; That you weren't terminally retarded."<br><br>Her eyes widened, "So that's why you kept pushing and pushing me.&nbsp; And gave me that stuff.&nbsp; Not to mess with my head.&nbsp; Or keep control over me.&nbsp; You were trying to keep me safe."<br><br>My head was spinning.<br><br><i>James advised me to tell her the true situation.&nbsp; Maybe he was right.&nbsp; But how could I when she hadn't even asked about her mother?&nbsp; She had to want to know, first...</i><br><br>She came closer, "You alright, Gran?&nbsp; You don't look well."<br><br>"Me?&nbsp; Tougher than grav-buffers.&nbsp; Anyway... we've gotten off-track, somehow."&nbsp; I wiped my eyes, shakily grateful that at least the crying had stopped, "I was going to tell you all about Bernice Starseer, seeing as it's Bernicenight and you're shortly off to the Ball with James."<br><br>She sank onto the floor at my feet, snuggling into the nest I'd made of my tentacles.&nbsp; Like she used to do, when she was little.<br><br>"Anyway, humanity was reduced to a sprinkling of scattered tribes, squabbling among themselves.&nbsp; The United Starcolonies Association managed to keep most wormholes and star-routes open, but their application to join the Sentient Species Coalition was foundering.&nbsp; Destroying our home planet was a black mark<br><br>against us, for one thing.&nbsp; The general view was that we were a barbarian species who'd survived by luck, rather than because we deserved it."<br><br>Looking up at me, her brow wrinkled, "So, these survivors – they all looked like me?"<br><br>I nodded down at her, "You could have jet-sledded down any trafway in those days without getting a second glance."<br><br><i>Wouldn't bet on it, though.&nbsp; Beauty has always been prized by humans – no matter their shape.&nbsp; And you are so very lovely to look at...</i><br><br>I continued, "Bernice Starseer - only nineteen - was the astro-navigator on the brand new USA flagship, <i>Nirvana</i>.&nbsp; She was beautiful.&nbsp; Over six foot tall, with milk-white, translucent skin, her bright blue eye was a riveting contrast to her multicolored cybernetic vision enhancer.&nbsp; And if that description sounds a bit OTT, remember it comes from the captain's private log-"<br><br>"Just a nanosec.&nbsp; You said that I was an ancestral human, like Bernice.&nbsp; But I haven't got any cyber-prosthetics."<br><br><i>Are you upset, again?&nbsp; No... just trying to make sense of this tangled mess.</i><br><br>I tried for a smile, "She was an astro-navigator, remember, and the basic human eye was designed for Earth-type conditions.&nbsp; Not to pick up star signatures dozens of light years away.&nbsp; Anyway, you have one thing in common with Bernice – she was also beautiful."<br><br>"Oh, Gran!" Her grin pummeled my heart into fluttering happiness. &nbsp;<br><br>All the gritted worry of the last miserable months splintered under the sudden belief that – somehow – it would be alright.&nbsp; She would cope.&nbsp; Even with me gone.<br><br>It would soon be time for James to bring the hovertram round to the front.&nbsp; And it seemed important that I finish the tale before they left.&nbsp; "The commander of the <i>Nirvana</i> was a Captain Smethers.&nbsp; He inspired loyalty in his crews and charmed his wealthy, capricious passengers.&nbsp; An ideal starliner captain.&nbsp; And he liked the ladies, who mostly liked him back.&nbsp; But he fell so hard for Bernice, it all but shattered him.<br><br>"Painfully shy, she found the nightly onboard entertainment excruciating.&nbsp; However, it was important that the passengers could meet the ship's astro-navigator – she was a major reason their tickets were so expensive."<br><br>Mary jumped up, "They were s'posed to have some kind of special star-sense, weren't they?&nbsp; There got to be so many legends and stories about them bringing ships back that in addition to the on-board AI, cruisers and warships always traveled with an astro-nav on board – like a backup."<br><br>My nictitating membranes quivered.&nbsp; <i>Where did you pick up that info-nugget?&nbsp; I never told you... </i> <br><br>She lifted her chin, "You know I've been hanging out with Riva..."<br><br>"Mm," Treasuring this precious unity between us, I didn't repeat my opinion about <i>that</i> flighty piece of mischief.<br><br>"...what you don't know is that her uncle is a Grade II Data Guardian – and he reckons that I'm a natural.&nbsp; He's been giving me lessons.&nbsp; Thinks I could get onto the Beginners Course."<br><br><i>And why would a high ranking Data Guardian bother with a young know-nothing like you? Because of your old-time human form.&nbsp; You are so very beautiful – and although we augmented beings have more advantages, we are no longer the sleek, neat creatures we used to be.</i><br><br>"That's wonderful, Mary." I didn't ask how she could possibly get onto any course without an Educational Merit qualification.&nbsp; This wasn't the time to bring up such issues. &nbsp;<br><br>She gave me a sideways look, "That all?"<br><br><i>What else should I have said?&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; </i><br><br>Her grin was wry, "Because this is where you normally start pointing out all the problems.&nbsp; How I couldn't attend because it was too far away and my frail frame couldn't withstand the stress of traveling..." she shrugged, "You know."<br><br><i>Ouch!&nbsp; Am I really so negative?&nbsp; No wonder you've been pulling away from me.&nbsp; Debra used to call me an old worry-wart.&nbsp; Was that how I lost her, too?</i><br><br>"Don't think we've got time for the end of the story.&nbsp; James will be here to collect you in five minutes and-" I stopped.<br><br>She clapped her hands together like she used to as a small child.&nbsp; "Oh, please, Granny!&nbsp; Doesn't matter if I'm a bit late, does it?"<br><br><i>Not when it means you want to spend a bit of extra time with me – instead of inventing excuses to rush out of a room the minute I enter it.</i><br><br>Smiling, I resumed the story, "Bernice wasn't a talker.&nbsp; Even Smethers admitted that.&nbsp; Like all astro-navigators, she had... foibles.&nbsp; There's always a price to pay for brilliance.&nbsp; Bernice didn't enjoy human company, other than her own.&nbsp; But she loved zero-grav dancing, and was superb at it.&nbsp; Smethers described it as soul-ballet.&nbsp; She used to practice in the gym during the dog watch, when the passengers were in bed.&nbsp; Crewmembers would sneak into the viewing gallery to watch her, but they had to be quiet.&nbsp; If she heard the slightest noise, she'd stop.<br><br>"And, of course, there was her chocolate box.&nbsp; She'd decorated it with beads and sequins and lined the interior with salt crystals."<br><br>"Like mine!"&nbsp; Mary darted across the room, her skirts flowing around those lithe little legs of hers.&nbsp; "That's what I've done.&nbsp; Exactly the same."<br><br>I looked again, realizing I hadn't seen past the knobbly, slightly uneven finish caused by the beads.&nbsp; Bernice-boxes these days were usually decorated with complicated representations of fractal patterns or fibonacci sequences – built by beings with more digits and manual dexterity than Bernice could ever have managed.&nbsp; But Mary's box was far closer to the original.<br><br>"Even got the salt crystals lining the interior – although that was a mega-fiddle, I can tell you."&nbsp; Carefully opening the box, she was intent on sharing her achievement with me.&nbsp; Just like she used to.&nbsp; Before our quarrel.<br><br><i>I am completely, utterly happy.</i><br><br>"That's amazing, Mary.&nbsp; Bernice would have loved this."<br><br>She looked up at me, glowing, "You really think so?"<br><br>"I really think so."&nbsp; <i>And I'm not just saying it.</i><br><br>"Whenever Bernice was stressed, she'd stare at fractal patterns within those crystals, using her cybernetic eye at max magnification.&nbsp; If Bernicenight hadn't happened, there's a good chance she'd have ended up like her mother, institutionalized in her thirties and obsessed with calculating how many fungal spores grew in a pound of Stilton cheese." &nbsp;<br><br>She giggled, "Bet that was mega-smelly!"<br><br>I joined in the laughter, before continuing, "Many passengers vied for Bernice's attention, but she seemed most at ease with Zentxs, the Quartropus ambassador for the Sentient Species Coalition, on holiday from his onerous duties.&nbsp; In those days, humans didn't study chromatic linguistics.&nbsp; But, Bernice seemed to find Zentxs' strobing color changes agreeable.&nbsp; I like to think that she was already well on the way to understanding Zentxs during those long cruise dinners Smethers made her sit through.<br><br>"Then came the St Valentine's Ball-"<br><br>"Hm.&nbsp; You sure about that?"&nbsp; She was frowning.<br><br>"About what?"&nbsp; <i>What've I said, now?</i><br><br>"When Guardian Javar and me were data-diving, we found allusions to Valentino's Ball."<br><br>"Valentino?&nbsp; Who was he?"<br><br>"A romantic actor from the Earth, early-movie era.&nbsp; Guardian Javar thinks that this link is more likely.&nbsp; Because when he dove after info-nuggets about this St Valentine, he discovered that he was a religious man who was killed over doctrinal disagreements."&nbsp; She rolled her eyes, "Doesn't sound very likely to become some sort of love icon, does he?"<br><br><i>And Mister Grade-Two is trying to teach this Granny how to untangle her tentacles.&nbsp; I've got a slew of Grade One artifacts that definitely nail St Valentine as the love icon for this Ball.&nbsp; Mary needs to learn that logic doesn't feature much when studying human history...</i><br><br>"That is certainly an interesting theory," I lied.&nbsp; "Maybe tomorrow you and me could go data-diving into some of my material and see if we can come up with an answer."<br><br>Her eyes widened, "You'd let me loose on your data-sink?"<br><br>"It sounds like you've had enough practice."&nbsp; <i>And if you haven't – what's a data-sink in comparison to a morning spent with my granddaughter?&nbsp; Especially as there aren't too many mornings left to us...</i><br><br>"Oh, thank you, Granny!"&nbsp; And she rushed up and threw her arms around my neck, whispering in my ear, "I love you, you know."&nbsp; And fluttered away, looking exotically fragile as her long skirt floated around her.<br><br>"I know, child.&nbsp; And I love you, too."&nbsp; <i>If only she could get her Educational Merit before I go, I can die happy.</i><br><br>"Well, as I was saying, the Valentino or St Valentine's Ball on <i>Nirvana</i> was a night for celebrating romance – which was when Smethers decided to make his move.<br><br>"He'd sent Bernice a ballgown in billowing layers of red and pink, and ordered her to wear it at the Ball.&nbsp; As he'd hoped, she looked stunning sitting between himself and Zentxs at the Captain's table, where he plied her with pink champagne throughout the meal.&nbsp; Under the drink's influence, the normally shy girl was transformed-"<br><br>"Is there going to be pink champagne, tonight?"<br><br>"There normally is.&nbsp; Mind you stop drinking the stuff when James says.&nbsp; It's gotten more than one girl into trouble.&nbsp; And without a doubt, Zentxs wouldn't have done what he did if it hadn't been for the champagne." &nbsp;<br><br>She huffed, "Well, of course.&nbsp; I'm not <i>that</i> much of a wet-brain."<br><br>James rolled into the room and cleared his throat.<br><br>Mary looked across at him, "Thank you, James.&nbsp; But Granny is telling me the story of Bernice Starseer and I want to hear all of it before we leave."<br><br>As she turned back to me, James gave me the OK sig. &nbsp;<br><br><i>He's always said that I shouldn't worry so.&nbsp; Looks like he's right...</i><br><br>I carried on with the tale, "Bernice held the table spellbound with a story of a lost starliner found by an astro-navigator using the glimmering light of newborn nebulae a million light years away. <br><br>"Stroking Zentxs' muscled tentacle absent-mindedly, she even agreed to partner Captain Smethers for the first dance, asking Zentxs to look after her precious box.&nbsp; After a questioning pulse of green-blue color from him, she lifted the lid and held it up before one of his large eyes.&nbsp; Opening his nictitating membrane a crack, a flood of purple, pink and red flickered over his skin at the stimulating sight of the fractals."<br><br>"Granny..." she sounded worried.<br><br>I tensed.&nbsp; "Yes, child.&nbsp; What is it?"<br><br>"Would you mind if I tried to find mother?"<br><br><i>Oh Debra, you'd be so proud if you could see what that tiny bundle of fury has turned into...</i>&nbsp; "Of course not.&nbsp; I think it's a wonderful notion."<br><br>"She might not want to see me."<br><br>"Mm.&nbsp; She might not.&nbsp; But, if she is pleased to see you, think of what you will have gained.&nbsp; And besides,"&nbsp; I paused, "at the least she'll be glad to know that you're solid.&nbsp; She probably thinks about you every day.&nbsp; That's how often I think about her."<br><br>"You do?" Her eyes widened, "I thought you didn't care.&nbsp; You never talk about her."<br><br>"There's nothing much to say.&nbsp; She's gone.&nbsp; I miss her."&nbsp; I changed the subject, before I started leaking tears, again.&nbsp; "Anyway, you should have arrived at the Ball two minutes and thirty-six secs ago.&nbsp; Let's get this story finished and then you can go and have a good time." &nbsp;<br><br>I dropped into my story-telling voice, finding comfort in reciting this tale to Debra's daughter, "This was the moment when Captain Smethers chose to sweep Bernice off to the dance space, finally holding her in his arms.&nbsp; However, she had other ideas.&nbsp; Slipping out of his grasp, she skimmed across the open space, flicking the layers of her dress in quickening patterns of red and pink.<br><br>"Suddenly, Zentxs launched himself alongside her, mirroring the color changes of her gown, swooping through the air with her, every bit as graceful as the slender girl.&nbsp; Turning to the Quartropus, she opened her arms and Zentxs came to her.&nbsp; Tenderly cradling her in his powerful tentacles, he claimed her for his own.<br><br>"Amid enthusiastic cheering from the passengers, Smethers slunk back to his seat.&nbsp; The rest is history.&nbsp; With Zentxs as a champion and spokesman for the human race, we were accepted into the Sentient Species Coalition with all the attendant trading and technological benefits.&nbsp; Humanity was safe. &nbsp;<br><br>"As for Bernice and Zentxs, they had a long, happy partnership – and even named their first-hatched child, Smethers."<br><br>I sank back into my narc-cush, relieved that this current crop of pain meds was doing such a solid job.&nbsp; "There.&nbsp; We've finally come to the end of the story.&nbsp; Bernice and Zentxs' children were all heavily augmented.&nbsp; And when Terran humans saw their advantages, many started having their offspring pre-natally changed.&nbsp; That's how it all started." &nbsp;<br><br>James rolled forward and gently collected Mary's Bernice-box from the table, preparing to leave.<br><br>"Have a wonderful time, sweet." I drew breath to remind her to listen to James.&nbsp; And stopped.&nbsp; She already knew.&nbsp; And my nagging wouldn't make it more likely that she'd obey.<br><br>She hugged me, then turned to go.&nbsp; Before swinging around, again.&nbsp; "Granny.&nbsp; I've something..." her voice was small and she wouldn't look at me, "I should've told you, sooner.&nbsp; But, I didn't.&nbsp; I was so mad after – you – you know..."<br><br><i>After I secretly&nbsp; dosed you with Memex to enhance your learning abilities in the run-up to your Educational Merit exam.&nbsp; And you found out...</i><br><br>Fear hit the back of my throat.&nbsp; <i>She's been secretive since that last awful quarrel.&nbsp; When we screamed things at each other than grandmothers and granddaughters have no business saying.&nbsp; She must've gone elsewhere for comfort and kindness, like her mother</i>.<br><br>I prayed to a Maker I no longer believed in.&nbsp; <i>Don't let her be pregnant.&nbsp; Please...</i><br><br>"Whatever it is, we'll manage.&nbsp; We always have." I forced my voice to stay steady.<br><br>Her head jerked up, surprised.&nbsp; "Oh no, it's nothing like that.&nbsp; You see – I got my results.&nbsp; My Educational Merit..."<br><br>Light-headed with relief, I waved both a tentacle and a hand, "Oh that.&nbsp; Yes, I knew the results had come in.&nbsp; Don't worry, luvvie.&nbsp; You can always have another go, next year."<br><br>She crossed the room and put an arm around my shoulders.&nbsp; "No.&nbsp; It's not that.&nbsp; After I found out about the Memex stuff...&nbsp; I thought you were twisting me into something I wasn't.&nbsp; Instead've trying to look out for me."&nbsp; She rolled her eyes, "Riva will call me an unaug'd mossbrain when I tell her.&nbsp; She always reckoned that you were solidly stellar.&nbsp; Especially after the results came through." <br><br>Mary's hand tightened as she added.&nbsp; "You see, I passed my Education Merit.&nbsp; With Distinction."<br><br>The End<br><br>Sarah Higbee lives on the south coast of England with her husband.&nbsp; Her stories have appeared in Abandoned Towers, Every Day Fiction and Everyday Weirdness.&nbsp; She is currently half-way through writing her science fiction novel Dying for Space, the second book in The Sunblinded Trilogy.&nbsp; The first novel, Running Out of Space, is due to be published in early 2010 by Cyberwizard Publications.]]>
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   <title><![CDATA[2008 Winners : 3rd - Cat Got Your Tongue, Evil Got Your Eye]]></title>
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    <![CDATA[<strong>Author:</strong> <a href="http://forum.sfreader.com/member_profile.asp?PF=1">SFReader</a><br /><strong>Subject:</strong> 3rd - Cat Got Your Tongue, Evil Got Your Eye<br /><strong>Posted:</strong> Mar-05-2015 at 5:36pm<br /><br /><i>I'm a sucker for stories where everyone but the main character(s) suddenly, mysteriously vanishes (think classic Twilight Zone episodes, Stephen King's "The Langoliers," John Wyndham's Day of the Triffids). Look around, not a living soul. Quiet, echoing empty: Where did everybody go? That was the impetus—that and the desire to write a dreamland story, but one in which the bizarre events could not be explained away as a dream. The problem with dream narratives is there is usually little at stake. Tension and suspense cannot be generated, because the reader can dismiss the most twisted, unsettling, nightmarish events with "It's only a dream." That is why I took pains to remind the protagonist, occasionally, that this is all really happening. Nods to Lovecraft and Neil Gaiman, who have made the dream lands an actual place in their stories.</i><br><br><b>Cat Got Your Tongue, Evil Got Your Eye<br>by Nicholas Ozment<br>copyright 2009 by Nicholas Ozment</b><br><p>The sky grew overcast. A breeze blew dry leaves across the empty street and bit through Alex's thin T-shirt. He shivered.</p><p>Then he heard something that jarred him -- a sane sound ripping through the madness: a police siren.</p><p>Alex picked up his pace to meet it. The siren grew louder; it was definitely coming his way. Then he saw a figure, down at the end of the block, running headlong toward him.</p><p>It was a young man with wild locks of blonde hair. The man wore a tan trench coat that flapped out behind him as he sprinted up the street. He didn't slow down as he ran past. His eyes fixed on Alex for only a moment, paying him no heed. But that look sent a chill to Alex's core -- it was a cold, malignant look. The eyes...</p><p>Alex recovered from the shock and stepped out into the street to call after the man. He noticed then the red blotch on the man's back -- it looked like he'd been shot square between his shoulder blades. </p><p><i>He'd have to be hopped-up on some strong drugs to keep going after taking a bullet like that. </i></p><p>Before Alex could think a second thought, his ears were assailed by the siren and screeching tires. He swung around just in time to see a police car careen around the corner and come straight at him.</p><p>The driver saw Alex in the same instant and cranked the steering wheel, which sent the car skidding across the street into a light-pole. The police officer burst through the windshield on impact. The siren stuttered, then moaned and trailed off into silence.</p><p>Alex's heart thumped painfully in his chest; his stomach knotted up, threatening to disgorge whatever contents it held. </p><p>The cop lay sprawled on the hood, arms dangling, ankles hooked on the glass shards. His head faced Alex's direction, eyes fixed in a blank stare. </p><p>Alex turned away from the sight, fighting back nausea. He spotted the other man crumpled facedown in the middle of the street about three houses up the block. They were both, pursuer and pursued, dead. He was sure of it.</p><p>His mind's surety was shaken for the umpteenth time that day when he heard a voice behind him, a voice that came from the smashed car: "You know what the lesson here is?"</p><p>The cop still lay in the same position on the hood, but his eyes now tilted toward Alex. </p><p>Struck mute by this new surprise, Alex just stared. </p><p>The cop's lips moved. The words gurgled from his throat, punctuated with a thin trickle of blood. </p><p>"Son, a police officer's addressin' you. Cat got yer tongue?"</p><p>Cat got your tongue. <i>Funny, that's what the cat had said, or almost said, to him this morning.</i></p><p>This all started with the cat.</p><p align="center">#</p><p>When Alex had awoken that morning, it was curled up at the foot of his bed, staring at him with unnervingly intelligent, yellow eyes: a long-haired gray Himalayan, with its breed's trademark smushed-in face that usually made Alex smirk when he saw one. </p><p>His reaction now was not to be amused; rather, he sat up in bed with a start. </p><p>He did not have a cat. </p><p>The cat did not budge as Alex slipped into his slippers and crossed to the bedroom window, thinking he must have left it open. It was shut. He wondered if Sara had come over to clear out some of her things and inadvertently left the front door unlatched.</p><p>"Hello?" he said through the bedroom door, quickly pulling on his robe. </p><p>"Is anyone there?" </p><p>No answer, and when he checked the front door, it was locked. When he went back into the bedroom, the cat was gone.</p><p>He took care of the first orders of business in his morning routine. After getting the coffee brewing and then visiting the bathroom, he went into the living room and flopped onto the couch.</p><p>When he aimed the remote at the television, someone spoke.</p><p>Alex leapt to his feet. The voice had come from down by the floor at the other end of the coffee table.</p><p>"I would not do that if I were you," the voice had said. </p><p>The Himalayan jumped up onto the other end of the couch and stretched.</p><p>"Who's there? Are you looking for your cat?" Alex called out, thinking it must have been a trick of acoustics that made the voice sound like it came from where the cat had been.</p><p>"Only if it is female and in heat," the cat said. It had a slightly British accent.</p><p>The remote dropped from Alex's hand. Mouth agape, he stared at the cat on the couch.</p><p>"What is the matter? Cat got your -- no, that one is too obvious. I must be feeling lackadaisical."</p><p>Alex finally got his mouth to work. "I'm -- I must be dreaming."</p><p>"Oddly enough," the cat said, "you are not. Normally, I am not one for coming right out and telling it straight, but this one time I will make an exception. You are wide awake. Keep it in mind. Otherwise you are liable to get yourself killed around here. And you will be certifiably dead."</p><p>"But then I must have gone crazy, because cats don't talk."</p><p>"They have no need to, where you come from."</p><p>"Where I <i>come from</i>?" Alex gestured around the living room to emphasize that he was in his own home.</p><p>"Appearances can be deceiving," the Himalayan muttered in his cool, slightly bored tone.</p><p>"Why did you say you wouldn't turn on the television if you were me?" Alex asked as he tried to think of something more intelligent to ask.</p><p>"Programming is a nightmare around here. It will suck you in. Getting hypnotized by the glass teat can be the death of you."</p><p>Convinced he was hallucinating, Alex went to the kitchen and picked up the phone. He was going to call in sick to work.</p><p>It was not a dial tone that met his ear, but a high-pitched scream. He slammed the phone back on the receiver.</p><p>He marched into the bedroom and threw on sweats, sneakers, and a t-shirt. He hoped a brisk walk in the autumn air would work out whatever had gotten into his system. </p><p>The street outside was quiet, unnaturally so. </p><p>Not a soul in sight anywhere -- no one jogging, watering a lawn, walking a dog. There were no sounds of street traffic -- none of the background noise suburbanites learn to shut out. Conspicuous in its absence. It was like he'd stepped into an episode of <i>The Twilight Zone</i>. </p><p>He decided to go back inside and check the morning news, cryptic warnings from a cat be damned. His mind raced through logical scenarios: maybe there had been a gas leak or a chemical spill in the area; everyone else had been evacuated. The gas could explain his hallucinations.</p><p>The door wouldn't budge. He'd locked himself out. </p><p>"<i>Damn</i>." </p><p>The word seemed to reverberate in the silence. </p><p>No keys -- his sweats didn't even have pockets. So he headed across the lawn to his neighbor's house, his sneakers leaving tracks in the morning dew.</p><p>No one answered when he rapped on the door of the Stewartsons' olive-green, stucco home.</p><p>"What's going on around here?" he muttered, pressing the doorbell two or three times for good measure.</p><p>On a whim he tried the door, and it opened.</p><p>Poking his head in, he called out, "Hello? Anyone home? It's Alex from next door!" </p><p>He stepped inside. A faintly fetid odor crept into his nostrils.</p><p>The television set in the living room was on. Two motionless heads jutted above the sofa, facing the large plasma screen.</p><p>Relieved that he had found somebody, he started to open his mouth -- but something restrained him, a creepy feeling that all was not right here. Then he noticed what they were watching.</p><p>An extreme close-up of a large breast filled the entire screen. The camera filming the breast was stationary. The only thing to indicate the station wasn't just projecting a still-image was that the breast would occasionally jiggle. <i>Just the slightest bit</i>. No more than if the model had yawned or shifted slightly.</p><p>Alex stared at the image for at least a minute, feeling a growing sense of unease, waiting for something, anything, to happen. </p><p>Every twenty seconds or so, hysterical laughter erupted from the TV. The laughter was brief and had the same inflections every time -- a laugh track. No other sound accompanied the monotonous footage. </p><p>The silent viewers sitting rapt on the couch did not budge. Alex couldn't even hear them breathe.</p><p>"Not much of a party," a scratchy voice spoke behind him.</p><p>Alex spun around, but saw no one there. Then he noticed the cat, curled up by a coat-rack next to the door. The Himalayan regarded him with its big, yellow eyes. It looked smug. </p><p>"This scene is dead," the cat said. "They just sit in front of the boob tube, rotting their brains away."</p><p>"Is that supposed to be some kind of joke?"</p><p>"You tell me," the cat replied. "I have never appreciated the humor in puns. Humans use the same sound for two different objects, then laugh when they have the opportunity to switch them around. It seems like the sort of game only humans and dogs could find amusing."</p><p>"But who would go to the trouble, of -- that?" Alex's words trailed off as he gestured at the breast filling the screen.</p><p>"In this land, it is often just as accurate to ask 'what' -- <i>what</i> would go to the trouble," the cat replied.</p><p>This failed to answer Alex's question but raised a new one.</p><p>"Wait -- this land -- what do you mean by that? Where am I?"</p><p>"You have fallen down the rabbit hole. You are in a dream land, but you are not dreaming. This paradoxical fact promotes you into a rather small handful of individuals."</p><p>"But what am I doing here?"</p><p>"For one thing, you are talking to me. But I grow tired of talking."</p><p>"How do I get back? I obviously can't just <i>wake up</i>, if I'm not dreaming."</p><p>In reply, the cat drooped its eyelids and gazed absently at the wall. Apparently, it really was tired of talking.</p><p>The occupants of the couch had not moved. Nor had the breast on the television. The odor had grown stronger, a smell of waste and spoiling meat. </p><p>He suddenly wanted to get far away from these . . . these couch corpses as quickly as he could. He yanked open the door. </p><p>As Alex stepped outside, the cat said, "I would not linger in this neighborhood long. It is not too safe. The eyes are coming."</p><p>Alex stood deliberating on the Stewartsons' brown lawn. </p><p><i>The eyes are coming</i>? </p><p>He turned left and started walking. Four blocks down was the local police station -- he didn't expect to find anything more sensible there than what he had already seen, but at least it was a goal.</p><p>He'd gone about a block and was passing a little park with a swing-set and some monkey bars. For just a moment, in his peripheral vision, he thought he saw living people. Children. But when he looked directly at them, he discovered the small figures on the swings and perched halfway up the bars were sculptures. They were outfitted with children's clothes, but they were molded of some porous clay, something like Silly Putty. And it was melting. Their faces had twisted into a semblance of Munch's <i>Scream</i>.</p><p>He grimaced, clenched his fists, and kept going.</p><p>When he came to the next intersection, the cat was perched on a blue postal box. </p><p>"Are you disconcerted?" the cat asked as he walked by it.</p><p>Alex stopped. "Disconcerted by what?"</p><p>"That I am talking to you, for one."</p><p>Alex shook his head. "No, oddly enough. I'm surprised that I'm not more hysterical. I mean, obviously I'm dreaming, and you can't get too surprised by anything in a dream, can you?"</p><p>The cat stretched, arching its back. </p><p>"You lost me there," it said. "I think I already mentioned you are not dreaming. Keep it up and I will scratch you. You can tell me if it feels like a dream scratch."</p><p>A low, garbled voice from inside the postal box said, "Your mind, when confronted with things it cannot reconcile, may lie to itself to maintain its sanity. But if it is deceiving itself, then is it really sane? The sanest thing may be to accept, to <i>embrace</i> the insanity. Because if you know you are insane, then you are not insane. Isn't that how the saying goes?"</p><p>Alex backed away from the mailbox. "If I'm not dreaming and I <i>am</i> standing here talking to the neighbor's cat and a mailbox, then I know I am certifiably <img src="http://forum.sfreader.com/smileys/smiley35.gif" border="0"> nuts."</p><p>The cat, if it is possible for a cat to grin, grinned. "We are all certifiably <img src="http://forum.sfreader.com/smileys/smiley35.gif" border="0"> nuts here. You must be too, or else you would never have come here."</p><p>"That's from <i>Alice in Wonderland</i>," Alex said, pointing an accusing finger at the cat.</p><p>"Most of it," the cat said. "I do not think the Victorians used such language, though." </p><p>The voice from the mailbox said, "You have not fallen into Wonderland, which is of course a fairy tale. You are in one of the Dreamlands, and everything here has a reason. It may appear chaos. But appearances can be deceiving."</p><p>"The mailbox makes an intriguing point," the cat said. "Oh, and I am not your neighbor's cat."</p><p>Alex huffed and kept on walking. </p><p>Another block on, as he passed a two-story house with yellow vinyl siding, he heard a baby cry. It came from an open upstairs window of the house. This made him hesitate, his thoughts redirected to something other than himself and his own confusion and fear. A baby trapped in this godforsaken nightmare? Having found a purpose, Alex jogged up to the front door.</p><p>He pounded on it, not expecting to get a response and not getting one. After a brief wait, he threw open the door and quickly surveyed a typical late-twentieth-century, suburban living room, the furniture strategically arranged around a dominating home-entertainment center. The big-screen TV was shut off, and there were no apparent occupants, dead or alive. </p><p>Alex ran up the stairs, bounding them two at a time as the baby's peals spurred him on.</p><p>At the top of the stairs he came to a hallway, a door on the left and two on the right. At the far end of the hall was a large bay window, hung with sky-blue curtains. Following the baby's cries, Alex went to the last door on the right. He opened it and stepped into the room.</p><p>Very little light filtered in through the curtains drawn across the room's single window, which had been left ajar. The curtains had a pattern of clown faces that grinned and swayed in the slight breeze.</p><p>A crib sat underneath this window, pressed up against the wall.</p><p>"No wonder you're upset, little fellow," Alex mumbled, crossing the room. "You're likely to catch cold with that breeze blowing over you." His throat was dry and his voice came out raspy. He coughed and looked into the crib.</p><p>A small quilt, with elephants sewn on, completely covered the baby. <i>At least he's wrapped up tight . . . maybe that's the problem, he's just about suffocating under there</i>. Alex reached down to pull back the blanket. </p><p>Something under the blanket with big, sharp teeth snapped at his hand. He gasped and yanked his hand back. Not waiting to see what the thing was, he ran across the room and stumbled into the hall.</p><p>Hands clenched on the stair railing, he tried to calm down. Once the sheer panic had passed, he wondered if the thing with sharp teeth was what had been making the crying noise ... or if the thing with sharp teeth was in there <i>with</i> a baby. </p><p>He had to be sure.</p><p>Fighting a primal urge to flee, he resolved to go back into the room. But not unprepared. </p><p>First he ran downstairs to the kitchen, jerked open drawers until he found a good-sized carving knife. Then he went back up.</p><p>Entering the room, he scanned every shadow, every nook and cranny. Steeled for another confrontation, he approached the crib.</p><p>Nothing stirred behind the vertical bars. He peered in -- at an empty mattress. He prodded the clumped-up elephant-pattern quilt with the knife. Nothing. </p><p>"sh*t," he muttered and started to leave. </p><p>As he stepped back out into the hall, a baby squealed behind him.</p><p>He rushed back in to throw open the closet door, but there was no question the crying came from inside the crib. Something sat in the crib, something with mottled gray skin, grinning through the bars, baring its fangs as it mimicked a baby's cry.</p><p>Alex dropped the knife and fled the room, and nearly plunged headlong down the stairs. </p><p>When he got to the bottom, he saw the cat.</p><p>The Himalayan sat on its haunches by the front door. It regarded Alex with its penetrating eyes.</p><p>"The baby up there is a monster!" Alex said.</p><p>"He looks like a typical human whelp to me," the cat replied.</p><p>Alex glanced back up the stairs to where the cat was looking.</p><p>At the top of the staircase sat a child of about twelve months, its short, chubby legs dangling over the top stair.</p><p>The cat added, "However, it probably should not be allowed to play with knives." </p><p>The baby held the knife Alex had dropped.</p><p>In a purring, sing-song voice, the cat recited:</p><p><i>That the kid is a brat</i></p><p><i>Should come as no surprise.</i></p><p><i>Take it from a cat:</i></p><p><i>That brat is born of Evil Eyes.</i></p><p>Then the cat disappeared through the pet door -- though Alex did not recall having seen a pet door there before.</p><p>When he looked back up the stairs, the child was gone, and in its place the mottled-gray thing sat grasping the steak knife. Only, it now sat halfway down the stairs, mere feet from him.</p><p>Alex threw open the door and darted from the house. </p><p>The cat was curled up on a tree-limb by the edge of the driveway.</p><p>"Where are you going?" it inquired as Alex slowed to a walk, panting.</p><p>"I -- I have to -- get away, away from that madhouse," he stammered.</p><p>"That tells me where you came from. Which I already knew. I am curious where you might go now. Out of the frying pan. You have left the madhouse and leapt back into the madworld."</p><p>Alex said nothing, just kept walking. </p><p>He'd gone about ten yards past the tree when the cat said, "I would not recommend that way though. That is the direction from which the eyes are coming."</p><p>Alex stopped dead in his tracks, then spun around to demand what the eyes were. The cat was gone.</p><p>He had no wish to go back to the madness from which he had come. There were no answers there. Maybe the eyes held the answer. So he ignored the cat's warning and kept going.</p><p align="center">#</p><p>And now he was talking to a dead police officer.</p><p><i>What is the lesson here? The dead cop wanted to know.</i></p><p>"Son, a police officer's addressin' you. Cat got yer tongue?"</p><p>Alex wanted to scream. But, responding to the authority in the dead man's voice, he muttered, "I don't know, sir."</p><p>"Well, I'll tell you what the lesson is. Always wear yer god-damned seat belt." </p><p>Then the cop began to move. He pushed himself up jerkily, shaking off bits of glass that tinkled on the bashed-up hood. He slowly extracted himself from the wreckage, pulling his legs free of the flesh-ripping glass. He tumbled onto the street. He stood up and began to limp away from the car, like a rag doll on invisible strings, seemingly unaware that his body was a bloody mess of ruptured vessels and broken bones.</p><p>Adding a new terror to the gruesome scene, the cop's right hand went to his gun-holster and drew a large-caliber six-shooter.</p><p>He did not point it at Alex. Instead, the cop motioned&nbsp; with the barrel to the other man's corpse further up the street. </p><p>"C'mon," the cop said, "help me git 'em before they git away. I hereby deputize you! Now shake a leg!"</p><p>Alex stared bewildered at the cop, who continued his pursuit, limping up the street towards the corpse. </p><p><i>Perhaps he's in complete shock, and he's playing out his last motivation before he expires</i>, Alex thought. But Alex fell in beside him, walking up the street with the bloody cop like they were two western heroes swaggering to a showdown. High noon on Third and Elm.</p><p>The cop was an inch or two shorter than Alex, who stood just shy of six feet. He looked pretty old to be still working the street -- Alex could see deep wrinkles where his face was not mangled and bloody. His hair and thick, bushy mustache were gray. Alex fancied that before the accident he might have looked a bit like Mark Twain. But Alex tried not to look at the cop's face. He expected the cop to fall over at any moment, but the cop kept marching purposefully toward his dead quarry.</p><p>As they drew near the body, some movement around the corpse's head caught Alex's attention. He watched in horror as the eyes -- those wild eyes that had looked at him for the barest moment and left a cold, dread feeling in his soul -- extricated themselves from the man's head. They pulled free, trailing vessels or tentacles, and began to scurry away, like jellyfish that could somehow propel themselves on land.</p><p>"Step on 'em, god dammit!" the cop yelled. "Crush 'em quick, before they git away!!"</p><p>But Alex just stood there, a few feet from the corpse, gaping in shock and revulsion as the two eyeballs scurried off.</p><p>"Aw hell, get back then, 'n hope to God I can still aim this thing with a shattered arm." </p><p>The cop drew a bead on one of the eye-creatures and fired. The shot echoed up and down the street. The eye vaporized in a pulpy burst.</p><p>The other one scampered underneath a parked car, a second and third shot following close behind it. One shot ricocheted off the asphalt; the next one punctured the car door.</p><p>"Son of a bitch got away," the cop muttered, holstering his gun. "Well, least there's only one now o' that pair. Only be able to <i>half</i>-take over some poor bastard."</p><p>"You mean, those things, they..."</p><p>"Eat out peoples' eyes, is what they do," the cop finished Alex's sentence. "Burrow right into yer skull while you're sleepin'. You can see through 'em just like they was yer eyes. 'Cept once they get in you, you only see things their way."</p><p>Alex stared at the last spot he had seen the eye. He felt numb, past feeling much of anything.</p><p>"What's yer name, son?" the cop asked.</p><p>"I don't remember," Alex said. "Um, Alex, sir."</p><p>The cop squinted at him. "I'm Officer Knight. Guess this is the end of the line fer me." </p><p>As the cop said this, he seemed to recede, as if a gulf was opening up between them. The street, the houses, the sky, all began to dim, grow insubstantial, swirl together. The cop said a few more words to Alex, barely comprehensible, just before he vanished into the vanishing world.</p><p align="center">#</p><p>"Your extractions went fine."</p><p>"Where am I?" Alex's mouth felt like it was full of cotton.</p><p>"In the recovery room. Your wisdom teeth are out and you're all set. The anesthesia is wearing off now. Just lie here for a bit."</p><p>The anesthesiologist swept out of the room, leaving Alex alone with his cloudy thoughts. A while later, a dental assistant came in and helped Alex off the wheel-bed. He felt groggy. </p><p>He was here to get his wisdom teeth removed... They'd become impacted; he should've had 'em out years ago... He'd wanted just a local anesthetic, but the orthodontist had elected to put him under...</p><p>"How long have I been out?" Alex asked the assistant, finding it somewhat difficult to talk without slurring.</p><p>"About an hour since the operation. Your wife stopped in just after we wheeled you back here, for about five minutes, and said she couldn't stay."</p><p>"Shara? No one elshe hash been back here shince then?"</p><p>"No, except for me peeking in on you every few minutes. Now you can come this way. Do you feel up to signing some paperwork? Your wife took care of most of it."</p><p>"She's not my wife, anymore," Alex said absently. "I mean, technically. But we're sheparated."</p><p>The dental assistant bit her lower lip, then said, "You'd have to see a counselor about that, not a dentist."</p><p>After signing a couple release forms and pretending to listen as the dental assistant reviewed the list of what he could and could not eat, Alex headed with relief for the door.</p><p>"Mr. Dyson," the assistant protested. "Do you have someone to pick you up? You're still recovering from the anesthesia."</p><p>Alex pulled out his cell phone and wagged it. "I'll call a cab."</p><p>As he walked across the waiting room, he happened to glance back at the receptionist. Her left eye swiveled in its socket, its gaze tracking him to the door -- completely independent of her other eye.</p><p>Alex just shook his head and stepped outside. The door swung shut behind him, and the sun shone down, dispelling nightmares.</p><p>But as he stood there, the last words of the mangled cop came back to him. "If'n you ever see that Evil Eye, you crush it. Like as not it'll be rooted, but don't you concern yerself about the head it's in; that poor soul's already good as dead. If you care about anything at all, you smash it, kill it, destroy it. Utterly destroy it."</p><p>Alex clenched his hands into fists and went back in.</p><p>His gaze swept over three people flipping through magazines, one woman trying with little success to keep her three-year-old son out of a potted plant. He fixed on the receptionist. She looked up at him, startled by the intensity of his gaze.</p><p>"Yes, Mr. Dyson, did you forget something?"</p><p>Alex didn't reply. The receptionist looked fine now; both her eyes seemed normal. Yet something was telling him to walk across the room, reach across the counter, and wrap his hands around her neck. His left eye twitched. </p><p>He realized with horror that it was in him. He had the evil eye.</p><p>"If you care about anything at all, you smash it, kill it, destroy it..." </p><p align="center">#</p><p>Alex woke up in the Marysville Institution for the Clinically Insane. There was a patch over his left eye. </p><p>An old man sat in a chair next to his bed. His white coat indicated he was one of the doctors. He looked a bit like Mark Twain. Alex glanced at the nametag on the doctor's coat: Knight.</p><p>"Landed yerself in the loony bin, son," Dr. Knight said. "I hear you put on a perty good Oedipus impression at the dentist's."</p><p>Alex said nothing.</p><p>Dr. Knight nodded. "It's about time for me to pass along my badge, anyhow. That patch on yer eye tells me you got what it takes. Reckon you're the new <i>hunter</i>. You'll have to do your rounds someplace between here and beyond the fields we know. You were there. Takes a while gettin' used to it, though, don't it?" Knight chuckled.</p><p>Finally Alex spoke. </p><p>"How do I get out of here?" He feebly raised one hand and gestured at the bars on the window.</p><p>Doctor Knight winked. "Just follow him." </p><p>Alex looked across the room to where the Doctor pointed. A cat was curled up on the linoleum. A familiar gray Himalayan. </p><p>In the wall next to the cat was a pet door. </p><p>This time, it looked just big enough for a man to squeeze through.</p><p><b>End</b></p>Nicholas Ozment lives in MN with his wife and, maybe by the time you read this, their daughter. He teaches college English and writes a bit of everything—stories, poetry, essays, literary criticism, film reviews. His work has won awards and been anthologized, podcast, and mentioned in Year's Best Fantasy and Horror. He is currently working on a story cycle, Knight Terrors: The (Mis)Adventures of Smoke the Dragon, which will be collected into a book and published by Cyberwizard Productions this summer.]]>
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